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Please Don’t Interrupt the DJ

Unless You Plan on Bribing Him

Surely you’ve been in this position before. You get to a club (or a live event, or house party) you get your drink on, and in no time you’re feeling just splendid. The DJ is playing some fine jams, everything is shiny, every one is having an amazing time. Then it happens.

Something inside your head goes off, just like a flashing light and siren. It’s the most brilliant thought of all time in fact. You think “you know what would make this perfect moment even better? If they played” ….insert your song here. It could be Skrillex or Donna Summer or Bob Marley or Metallica or Nicki Minaj or Pitbull or the latest remix of Rihanna and woman-beating-twitter-trash-talking-auto-tuned-dance-sensation Chris Brown. It doesn’t matter really. All that matters is that you have to hear it right then and there or your life won’t be complete. You stumble through the crowd, pushing people as you make your way across the dance floor, and begin yelling at the DJ, trying to get his attention.

It’s like the guy is blind or something. Right? His head is moving back and forth to the beat, he’s got his eyes open, but he just can’t see you waving your hands over your head and yelling. If you didn’t know better you’d think he was intentionally ignoring you! So you spend nearly five minutes forcing your way around to the entrance to his booth and rush in to give him your oh-so-important suggestion. What you can’t understand is why he seems so annoyed. This is a party right? The DJ should be beyond stoked to hear your amazing music suggestions, shouldn’t he?

Recently a patron at a hip hop club tried to interrupt legendary DJ Kid Capri to ask if he would play some reggae. Maybe she’s a fan of our new favorite artist Snoop Lion. What she got treated to instead was a long lecture from the Old School mixmaster about never doing it again. She was lucky that at least when the verbal chastising was over the DJ bought her and her friend free drinks for being a good sport. Unfortunately she ended up on Youtube.

One girl who was not so lucky thought it would be a good idea to run into the DJ booth and grab the DJ by the headphones to yell her musical suggestion to him. She’s very cute. Usually cute girls can break the DJ rule, and all sorts of other rules in society, and still get away with it. Not this time. The DJ starts screaming like a hysterical widow at a funeral, stopping the music, and waving his hands like a drowning man. The look on her face says everything you need to know. She can’t understand why he’s so upset that she snuck up behind him in his booth, grabbed his headphones off his dome, then screamed right in his ears while he was mixing tracks.

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Some people are just so sensitive. One things for sure – the DJ isn’t getting any more popular making cute girls cry in public. You’ll never score a hot chick that way buddy. Cool it down. DJ Pauly D would never flip out like that and he’s from the Jersey Shore!

DJ’s can be pretty fickle people. Sure it’s okay for them to talk over your favorite song or shout their name over and over for no reason during a new track from your favorite artist, but it’s not okay for you to bug them while they are working. Some DJ’s might only be hitting preset buttons, that’s true. Then again they might be ACTUALLY MIXING in which case they need to be able to hear the song.

One sure way to get the music you want played is to be the one paying the DJ. If it’s your party, then the DJ has to listen to you! No play, no pay baby! Another cash inspired way to get your groove on is the old BRIBE the DJ trick. Works nearly every time! Money talks and bullshit walks. DJ’s are not above speaking the international language of cold hard cash. Just know you’re probably only going to get a song or two out of this at the most – and lead with the green to get their attention!

If you want to hear a specific set of tracks in a row — but don’t want to bribe the DJ — here’s what we suggest – Load up your iPod with your favorite music, put it in a playlist, then blast it from your Boombot for a special circle of friends. Then you’ll be the DJ! Be careful though, people tend to offer DJ’s all sorts of unsolicited free advice about what to play. Now you know how it feels suckerpunch!

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